I recently heard newscaster Jane Pauley interviewed. She remarked that she had always been a bit embarrassed that she could never answer the standard question, “What’s your passion?” She said that she had always made career changes when she began to feel “finished” with the last role but the subsequent directions were more about opportunities that were conveniently presented than choices based on passion. Once she became engaged with the new direction, she found it very absorbing, but she had never thought of it as a passion. She contrasted herself with her sister who, over a lifetime, had cycled through a number of passions and, when they were exhausted, moved on to others.
I don’t really think that Jane Pauley is that different than her sister. Whether they think of their activities as resulting from passion or not, people who do things well will be committed to the undertaking in a consistent way.
The cultural myth that you must find your passion and then pursue it doggedly is damaging for many people. You may endlessly seek your one “true” love and feel inadequate when you don’t find it. Or, you may hold on to something that is no longer engaging because at one time you considered it your passion. That’s the passion trap.
Passion Fulfilled
I have a good friend who happened to take Geology as a Freshman in High School. He loved it. It became a passion for him. He decided then and there that he was going to be a geologist when he grew up. As a Junior, he researched universities with strong Geology programs and had his pick because he was a National Merit Scholar and the Valedictorian of his high school. He earned his Master’s in Geology with Distinction and went to work for a major oil company. Everything was fine until the oil industry tanked in the 1980s and his family almost went bankrupt while he tried to find a nonexistent job in his field. He was forced to accept half his salary and became a computer tech for almost a decade before he lucked into another geologist’s role. He says that Geology is still his passion, but before he found the new job he had adjusted to the idea that, like most of his contemporaries, he would never work in a geology role again.
We could write this story in terms of perseverance, but I really think it turns on chance and his willingness to be flexible. Yes, he is very capable, dedicated, and easy to work with, but many others were too, and they never had the opportunity to return to their former careers.
Passion Unfulfilled
When he was young, my son had always resented the fact that school required him to write papers about topics that were already fully explored and learn math operations that anyone else could do. He was a good student, probably because he was bright and learned intuitively, but he never invested much. He was socially focused and was always the leader of a pack of kids.
Then, when he was fourteen, I took my son and a friend of his to visit the Naval Academy in Annapolis, Maryland. It never occurred to me that this would ignite an overriding passion.
As we walked around the campus and toured the naval training ship moored on the river, my normally blasé son was agog. He was enthralled by the midshipmen in their whites and everyone stepping smartly and saluting. The companies running in cadence and swabbies scrubbing the deck were fascinating. That day he began planning to become one of them.
Over the next three years he found naval officers to interview about life in the service and investigated the criteria for selection. Because he knew his school performance would count, he was a bit more focused. When the opportunity came to spend a week at the academy as a prospective midshipman, he came home proud that he was able to meet all the demands of “Sir, yes Sir!” and do endless pushups for minor rule infringements. He was more convinced than ever that he’d found the life for him. He was assigned a reserve officer who acted as the boy’s mentor through the application process and began seeking a Congressional appointment to Academy.
Everything was on track until my son took his pre-nomination physical. The amount of astigmatism in one eye exceeded the set limit. We petitioned for an exemption and had him examined by a navy physician a couple of months later with the same results. My son held out hope that he would receive an exception until the day that the new plebes had to report for duty.
He had a dream. He did everything he could to make it happen. It didn’t. Like all those passionate geologists who were unable to get back into their fields, my son had to adjust his goals. I suspect that it the clear expectations, opportunities for advancement and levels of authority and responsibility in the services drew him and he began looking for those same qualities elsewhere. These days he is a mid-career diplomat for the U.S. State Department and doesn’t mourn what might have been.
The Passion Trap: Why Passion is Not Enough
As I said, I have never had a passion that I could identify. Instead, when I have encountered things that I liked to do and that challenged me but were achievable, I pursued them. I have cycled through a lot of interests just as Jane Pauley has (but not with her measurable success). When I realized that I had gone as far as I could in one direction, I looked for something else that would be equally consuming. I joke that I can’t figure out what I want to be when I grow up, and my three Master’s degrees and four successive career directions attest to my desire to keep learning but never to become stale. Unfortunately, I think I have wasted a bit of time wondering why I never conformed to the cultural expectation that I find my passion.
Whether you are like my geologist friend and were fortunate to find a consuming passion that you could pursue for most of a lifetime, my son whose passion was denied him, or me with sequential quasi-passions, do not fall into the passion trap. In your early years you should try the things that present themselves and attempt to learn what is engaging to you and why. It will take a lifetime to see where it leads.
How to Find a Life Direction (Whether it is a Passion or Not)
Are you into puzzles? Do you lose track of time when you are chasing down details to figure out where a problem lies?
Are you most alive when you are negotiating with people to find a way to meet common objectives?
Are you happiest when you are using your hands to make something beautiful or useful?
If you can answer fundamental questions like these about your temperament and personality, you have a much better shot at flexibly finding directions that will keep you happy and fulfilled and building an authentic personal brand identity.
I look over my life and see several common threads between the seemingly divergent directions I have pursued. I was enthused about each of them for extended periods of time. When they were no longer interesting, I invested in something else. Looking back, I am pleased.
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